I wanted to do a post on Marriage (and post a few of my fav wedding photos!) I am coming up on my first anniversary. I understand I have YEARS ahead of me to truly learn what marriage is but I want to put on paper (or virtual paper) how I feel today. If I had known in my single dating years what I know now, I would be a lot less afraid of my future and overall happier-- so I guess this post is retrospectively for my former self and for those that still wonder.

 

You have to put my dating experience in the context of  Mormon culture. When I say it's hard to be single and 24, it actually can be. I recall feeling like my life was running on a treadmill- trying so hard to move forward but not actually going anywhere. If you feel this way, stop it. You are going somewhere and you are moving forward. I strongly believe that no girl should place their importance on whether or not they are a wife or a mother. You can be happy with just yourself. Best advice I ever heard, "marriage won't make an unhappy person happy". It's true and I remembered that often. I also forgot it often. When I remembered that advice, I chose to find the areas in my life that were growing- my education, my career, love for yoga, my relationships with girlfriends etc... 

 

 

 

In the same vein, I also believe that a culture revolved around marriage isn't a bad thing. I think marriage has elevated me in so many ways. I'm glad I still looked for it. The common censure that marriage is more like "a ball and chain" couldn't be more wrong for me. In fact, the exact opposite is true. I think being single made me a slave to the life of dating. A slave to my search for love. I have felt complete freedom of life since the moment I found my person. I believe marriage was my next step in this journey of life and has only given me thoughts that say,"I can do anything and be anything-- I have someone that supports and loves me no matter what. If I fall, I fall into him."

 

 

 

I'm getting beside my point, my point for this post is to say that it's ok to believe in a "fairy tale" happiness within reason. I am constantly surprised at how beautiful everything is. I shouldn't be surprised by this but years of dating can make you believe "love" isn't out there and everyone "settles" in one aspect or another. Wrong. I can honestly say I have married the man of my dreams and we live our version of a fairy tale life. We get to hang out every evening and talk/complain about work. We get to make dinner together and go to the gym and hit up the hot tub regularly. We get weekends full of good food and nieces/nephew hugs we want to never end. I guess the difference is choosing what you want your fairy tale to be. I decided what a good and happy life was when I met Devan. A fairy tale life centered on family, kindness and consideration.

I don't think life has to be hard. There will be hard things to live through but that doesn't have to dictate how you feel about living. Some may call me naïve and young in marriage and that may be true-- but for now, I am letting the beauty and happiness of life fill me in every corner of my being.